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It is hard to stay out of the 24 hour news cycle with a Reality TV President’s wheels coming off and an incredibly partisan extreme right wing supreme court nominee cruising to confirmation.  I feel somewhat befuddled, asking myself what can I do? Am I watching a train wreck in agonizing slow motion? The biggest impact I feel is the feeling of powerlessness. I want to look away because I know it is not life affirming to watch, think about or listen to the details.  

And then I have to ask, more as a self defense, how will the craziness impact me, in what ways?  Of course the troubling aspect of this strategy is that I don’t know the impact. It is hard to imagine a good outcome from all of the stupidity, corruption and mischief but I am left short on specifics..  The more immediate impact is that feeling of powerlessness, watching day after day the brutish, nonsensical behavior and my inability to intervene in a meaningful way. Until all I am left is that of a bystander and this curiosity of what’s next, a spectator.  Other strategies also seem to be a reminder, like a ringing in the head, of my inability to act in a meaningful way to stop what I conceive as a clear and present danger.

Like an insidious slow poisoning, the waters of hope and the ability to act in ways that are life fulfilling are slowly infiltrated by this helplessness, powerless poisoning.  It takes extreme effort to even put these words on the page, to paint the picture of this immobilizing depression that this TV show on the national stage invokes.

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